If you took just the first 15 minutes and the last 10 of Paul Harrison's The House of Seven Corpses, you'd have a damn fine horror film. The premise is wonderful: a film crew shooting a schlocky horror film in a haunted mansion accidentally awaken a zombie who kills them off in ways that re-enact the grisly ends of the original inhabitants. The premise is just the right blend of hokey camp and intriguing high-concept that one can't help but be interested. The cinematography is moody and disorienting in its languidness. The mansion itself is a great set. And some of the performances--especially a world-weary Richard Burton-esque character actor--are inspired. But none of this can save the film from one undeniable fact: the vast majority is boring and not scary. Most of the film doesn't even have a pretense of dread or suspense. It's just empty provocation without any emotional or psychological weight. Here's one film I wish would get a remake--I want somebody to do this story justice.
5/10
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